Savor Your Accomplishments

Posted on March 31, 2015 by Demetria Foster Gray

I’ve accomplished a lot in my years on this earth, but rarely do I ever take time to savor those accomplishments.

As a toddler I learned how to walk and how not to pee in the bed. As a kid I learned to roller skate, go fishing, play the piano, and French braid my hair. As a teenager I learned to drive, kiss boys, use a sewing machine, become an avid reader, and write a lot of poetry. As an adult I worked various jobs, received a college degree, created a career, received a marriage license, given birth to children, bought a home, and published a novel. And that’s just the short list.

We all have huge lists of accomplishments that have shaped our lives, yet we forget to honor them. We don’t take time to bask in the glow of them or be in harmony with what they’ve taught us or how far they’ve brought us. So this past weekend I took time to bask in the knowledge of who I am, why I am, and how far I’ve come. To savor those things that have helped me become…me.
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I think we all know life is just a string of events and accomplishments, mixed with highs, lows, twists, turns, and amazing detours. Yes, sometimes we get stalled and can’t seem to move and other times we are moving but feel kind of stalled. But did you ever consider that sometimes, maybe, we should just be still and savor what we’ve accomplished—from birth to now. Give honor to all the nuts and bolts that built us into the magnificent people we’ve become.

It’s often said we’re so focused on trying to get to where we’re going that we don’t appreciate where we are or where we’ve been. Well, I’m here to say I appreciate where I am, even though sometimes (most times) I’m anxious to get to where I’m going. And from now on I’ll try to honor my accomplishments by savoring where I’ve been.

Do You Recognize Yourself

Posted on November 22, 2014 by Demetria Foster Gray

In life as you mature, change, grow, and evolve you become unrecognizable to some of the people around you.

They no longer see in you who you used to be and they become somewhat uncomfortable—even seem to dislike the new and improved you.

It’s natural for the people who know you to be leery and skeptical of your growth, and to find the “new you” hard to accept. Hard to believe. And rightly so, because what once was, no longer is.

We’re all creatures of habit—we want things to stay the same. But change is inevitable and there’s always a price to pay during our transformation. Values change, priorities shift, and relationships slip, stumble, or fall while new ones are formed.

The people who are unable or unwilling to recognize who you’ve become and who you’re becoming are the very same people who stunt your growth. If your growth gets stunted, you tend to stand in the same old spot year after year.
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How long can you stand in your same old spot?

So here’s the thing: becoming unrecognizable to the people around us is a good thing. It means we’re growing and transitioning into who we’re meant to be. It’s not our problem if the people around us choose NOT to recognize our growth or our worth, and want to stay complacent in who we used to be.

As long as you recognize yourself, no other recognition matters.

Stay true to you.

Photo by Scott Chen

Sweet Talking My Ego

Posted on March 26, 2013 by Demetria Foster Gray

Let’s face it; our ego gets in the way of our truly gifted self. The ego is in tune with the world and all the many traps it sets for us. It blinds us from who we really are and hinders our growth.

There are so many things in life we strive for, so many bright stars we shoot for, and so many ways our ego puts a halt to obtaining those goals. We start to focus on the wrong stuff and then lose our way. Wondering what happened, oblivious to the price we pay.

I spend a lot of time demanding sweet-talking my obnoxious ego into submission, needing it to conform to my logical, rational, spiritual way of thinking, of doing, and of being. A lot of time I only recognize my ego only after it has driven me off the road and landed me in a ditch.
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Crap! Not again. And again.

So I spend time sweet talking my ego, trying to befriend it, to understand it, to live along side of it, without letting it take reign and have total control. Last night when I was snapping at my husband and screaming at my kids, I recognized the ditch I was in. And yet I stayed in that ditch because I was tired and upset. I didn’t sweet talk my ego, I gave it full reign to ride.

They say there are only two types of people in the world: those who do, and those who do not. Unfortunately, I am neither of those types, because the simple fact of the matter is; sometimes I do, and sometimes I do not. And I know I’m not alone. It’s a massive population.

Last night I didn’t sweet talk my ego, and I ended up in a ditch.

Photo by Getideaka