The New “B-Word”
Author: Demetria Foster Gray
Well it happened. I’m officially old. And I’m not talking numerically, I’m talking visually.
Yesterday I got new glasses! Yet this big news is of no huge revelation considering I’ve worn glasses or contacts since I was fifteen. However, the huge revelation is in the type of glasses.
My eye doctor likes to call them progressive lenses, but we all know they’re the b-word. The dreaded bifocals—old people specs.
I knew it was coming. All signs pointed to it, but I was hoping I could continue wearing my regular old glasses forever. I was hoping to opt out of the b-word, but everyone in my family are blind bats. I’m the youngest of six siblings and all six—plus mom and pop—sport specs, so how could I run from my bloodlines.
And although I’m deeply grateful my new specs are the no-line bifocals—without that noticeably, inappropriate line at the bottom (do they even make those anymore?), I’m pretty sure I’ve lost my “cool points” by wearing these glasses. But guess what? I like them. And guess what else? They kinda look better than my old ones. Go figure.
So go ahead, you may call me the b-word if you like because I’m over here rockin’ my new specs with sass and grace.
[NaNoWriMo Update: Got a few more chapters under my belt, but starting to wonder if I’m in over my head.]
Photo by Maggie Smith
Tags: Bifocals, Eyewear, Glasses, NaNoWriMo, Progressive Lenses, Specs, The B-word
5 Responses to “The New “B-Word””
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November 11th, 2011 at 7:35 pm
LOL!!! I have had the B-word for years now. Just never said anything. Because you know I am vain:) I remember the day like it was yesterday. I walked into the eye doctor thinking I was cute with my jeans and Prince t-shirt on. And the doctor had the nerve to say the B-word or as they say progressive lens. But I only wear my B-words in the house. I have recently found out that my contacts are not enough. So now the eye doctor says I might need readers over my contacts. Well all I have to say is getting old is a “B”. LOL!!!
November 12th, 2011 at 9:43 am
Sharon, sometimes your comments crack me up! I can totally picture you walking in the doctor’s office with your “Prince” t-shirt on thinking you’re all that. Hilarious!
I gave up being vain about glasses so many many years ago, that I prefer wearing them instead of my contacts. But you’re definitely right, getting old is a “B” (Hilarious!), but as long as you do it sassy and graceful, it’s all good.
November 12th, 2011 at 10:55 am
Welcome to the “B” world Dee Dee. I’ve been a member for a couple years myself. Medical treatment that I received in the past doubled my prescription from just 1 year prior. So there’s my excuse. Aside from the “B” word, lower back pain, stiff joints, and increased snoring (so I’m told), I’m aging sassy & graceful!!
November 12th, 2011 at 11:54 am
LOL! Starla, back pain, stiff joints, and snoring are incredibly sassy and graceful. Didn’t you get the memo? Plus, why am I the last to know about you and Sharon’s bifocals? You guys have been visually undercover. Stop holding out!
I mean, I’ve been needing bifocals for about a year, every sense they changed my contacts to multifocal but not my glasses. When my glasses changed, it all became very real, very official to me.
November 12th, 2011 at 12:04 pm
By the way, I’m still trying to navigate head movements while wearing my new specs. You know, tilting head up for reading and forgetting to tilt down when not. Not to mention the discombobulation when walking DOWN stairs. Yet, let’s not forget…it’s sassy, it’s graceful!